Talk. Encourage. Exemplify.

Although it is not considered a criminal offense, emotional abuse is a serious issue, and one I think is often overlooked in teen and young adult relationships. Many young people do not understand the dynamics of a healthy relationship and allow their partner to control their actions for fear of rejection or dismissal.

Most parents wouldn't think twice about whether or not it's important to have "the sex talk" with their children, but how many have had "the relationship talk"? It's important for young people to know they are not an object, and it's never ok to change the way you dress or who your friends are just because your partner says so. You are your own person and should make your own decisions.

Self respect is not something inherent to all young people, and with new avenues like social media kids feel even more pressure to project a cool, sexy image in order to "get" and "hold onto" a boyfriend or girlfriend. Unhealthy celebrity relationships certainly don't help. Adults understand the constant infidelity, emotional and even physical abuse portrayed in celebrity relationships is not healthy, but for young people it is starting to appear to be the norm.

According to the Southwest Crisis Center, which serves Jackson, Nobles, Pipestone, Rock and Cottonwood counties in southwest Minnesota, studies show at least one in ten teens will be in an abusive relationship. As the non-profit organization's web site points out, "It's not easy to leave an abusive relationship at any age. It is even harder for teens to leave abusive relationships because of fewer resources and uninformed adults who think it's 'just two kids fighting'."

For many people, the way we act and are treated in early relationships affects the dynamics of relationships later in life. Emotional abuse leads to self doubt, which can lead to trust issues. Infidelity leads to anger and hurt, which can lead to returned infidelity. Neglect leads to resentment, which can lead to emotional abuse, infidelity or apathy towards other relationships. And the scary cycle continues.

So, what can we do to diminish the cycle? Talk. Talk to your children, siblings or friends who look up to you (respect parental/professional boundaries, of course). Let them know they deserve to be treated with respect, and that healthy romantic and platonic relationships begin with self respect. If you're concerned they are currently in an unhealthy relationship, click here for advice on how to address the situation.

Encourage. Encourage your schools to create awareness about physical, sexual and emotional abuse through appropriate lyceums presented by education and outreach organizations like New Horizons Crisis Center. Exemplify. Exemplify a healthy relationship with yourself, with your partner and with others. Be a quality role model for your children, siblings and all young people. Don't be afraid to ask for help if you feel you are treading unsafe waters. Respect yourself enough to know you deserve happiness, and you may be surprised how many others will follow suit.